What couples can do to create healthy relationships as well as satisfying and more fun.
Some couples can’t get along at all. They fight a lot and don’t bother with treating each other with any level of courtesy. It’s too sad and something that shouldn’t happen.
Besides the fact that it makes people very unhappy, it’s also very stressful and hard on everyone involved, both mentally and physically.
My husband has awful memories from his childhood. His parents fought constantly and he has blocked his memories of their life and his life with them.
He grew up determined to be different from them and determined to have different…and better…relationships. He only had to look as far as his grandmother to see what kind of person he wanted to emulate.
Here are five things we do every day to make our life together better and happier.
1. Treat each other with courtesy. No one is exempt from this rule. Attention and kindness begins at home. Loving someone requires paying attention to the need for loving-kindness. Give them a hug when you leave or come back home and a welcoming smile. Offer small special gift like cooking their favorite food on the weekend or filling up their gas tank. It’s not that complicated. Think of the way a pet welcomes you home. Humans should be able to handle that. A loving touch warms all hearts.
2. Stop with the insults. If you don’t like what they are wearing, buy them something new. Being mean to your lover is not going to give either of you what you want.
3. Help each other move on through life’s disappointments. We all have them, but how you handle them together can make your life better and more satisfying. Home is where we are supposed to support each other emotionally. Here is a bit of relationship advice. When (not if) life throws crap at you, don’t let it screw up your relationship. Relationships should be bigger than daily life issues.
4. Exercise together. If you don’t have time, change things so you do have time. Good lovers are healthy and strong. It’s also great for helping to put life’s problems into perspective as well as a good prescription for depression.
5. I have said this before but it’s still great advice. Your bedroom is for intimacy. It’s for making love, being together and sleeping. It’s not the place to surf the net, pay bills, fold laundry or whatever. Intimacy is fun. Get more of it and keep that room sacred.
Couples can and usually do grow and change. You can grow and change together…or not. Stop snapping at each other, immediately. It’s certainly more fun and more emotionally rewarding to work together at building good healthy relationships. We find being and living happily together very exciting and rewarding. You can, too. One of my favorite things my husband does for me is slipping into the kitchen and giving me a hug from behind as I stand at the counter doing food prep. We really get into that rather R rated snuggle. Kitchens are SO sexy!
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